As we age, we have to grow for true maturity. Staying in the same head space and sometimes even the same place can hinder us.  Evolution is uncomfortable. You’ve become familiar with one set of norms and growth challenges you to be someone different. 

I know it’s scary but with every day your life should become enriched with ideas and opportunities of growth. This in no way means you’ll have a new personality on a daily basis. If for some reason this happens, please seek professional assistance. At 30+, I don’t even think of things the same as I did at 30. I can truly say I’m growing, opening up to new experiences and looking for a every opportunity to smile. ūüôā

The purpose of my life may not be clearly visible but I’m acknowledging I want to get there. I believe everyone on this earth wants to live in their purpose – but how will you know if you’re stuck in the same spot. In order to discover everything or even a portion of what it feels like to live in your purpose you have to break away from some norms. Embrace the uncomfortableness of the process and BE GREAT. 

Have you noticed your evolution? Was it a welcomed change? 

I’m pretty organized. ¬†Every morning I’m up early – running through the things I mentally noted that I needed to take care of. ¬†Somehow, I manage to stop at least once a day to concentrate on what I was “suppose” to do. ¬†On occasion, I remember whatever it is and other times it comes to me as I lay me head on the pillow. ¬†I’m not proclaiming that I’m forgetful but I will acknowledge when change is needed. ¬†I was determined to get my schedule in in check and become more productive.

I purchased a daily planner from target the beginning of the year. ¬†Things were on track but I didn’t have enough space to write down what I needed. ¬†So, I only used the monthly view pages, which allowed me to see when I was doing things. ¬†I needed more! ¬†A colleague (HA! – I said colleague) of mine had shown me her Day Designer Planner early this year and I never forgot it. ¬†So I thought maybe this is something I need to invest in. ¬†Needless to say, I kept going with my poor method and wasn’t maximizing my day. ¬†In this new position, I realized that I had to get some order in my schedule. ¬†I was on the hunt. ¬†I liked the Day Designer but it wasn’t me. ¬†I went to my homie, YouTube for answers. ¬†Through a few comparison reviews and unboxings, I found the one for me in the eRiN Conderen brand.

Here it is! ¬†Isn’t it lovely? ¬†If you would like to hear the details of the order and features included, please follow me on Periscope @stoical127 for the live review. ¬†Why I chose to go with this company? ¬†I like the customization options because I don’t want to walk around with the same planner as everyone else. That’s just one of my quirks. ¬†The colors were bright and changed throughout the year in the planner. There are¬†motivation quotes, sufficient space to write and the little welcome pouch was a nice way to get you to try out other products. ¬†So I ordered the planner after I finally decided how I was going to decorate my work space. ¬†I decided on¬†the Cynthia Rowley Floral office collection to breathe a little life into my cube of beige.

After some very stiff competition, I went with my favorite shade of blue in navy surrounded by flowers and we know how much I love flowers. ¬†In an upcoming post I’ll show you how I decorated everything. ¬†There are still things to hang on the wall. ¬†You all know decorating takes time. ¬†It’s never as easy as HGTV will have you to believe. ¬†Is it wrong for me to want a chic chair or should I hold of until I get my library? ¬†ūüėČ ¬†I’ll be looking forward to your feedback in the comments.

Other reasons why I went with this I like the layout. It allows me to break my day up into 3 sections that are important to me and provide room for changes. ¬†I’m not taking about morning, noon and night. ¬†My days consists of fitness, work and evenings. ¬†I’ll have some pictures after I set it up for you to have a peek into my daily life. ¬†Another unconventional criterion was the CEO‘s energy. ¬†She put a face to and voice to the products. ¬†I felt she understood what some of us busy people feel. We want to take care of everything but feel there’s NEVER enough time in a day. ¬†Some people wouldn’t have cared that she made those YouTube videos but it mattered to me.

I’m in love and have picked up quite a few tips on how I can make planning fun and personal for me. ¬†The cover is my very own (check my IG: @bmisunderstood) picture and the cover can be switched out with another. ¬†This is awesome for me because I like to change things up from time to time and like the idea that I never have to lose my cover because it’s time for a new planner.

I’ll keep you updated on how everything progresses through the year and if this method works for me as well. ¬†ūüôā


I told you all that I had been going through some things lately. ¬†Moreover, I decided not to let it get me down and create an action plan to prosper. ¬†In some of my earlier posts, I have referred to myself as the girl from the Detroit hood. ¬†After seeing this quote, I realized this is exactly what I was trying to communicate with that line. ¬†My time in that environment shaped me, taught me and prepared me for the work I would have to put forward not to end up in those places. ¬†When the kid was born I knew I had to do better not only for me but so he wouldn’t know the life I lived personally.

In essence, you’re more than the environment you grew up in or anything that could be view as a hindrence or advantage. ¬†You are the collective product of the choice and decisions you’ve made. ¬†I choose to win, to get over these hurdles and learn from these trying times. ¬†Things aren’t how we want to be all the time but you can transform any situation. Take responsibility for your destiny and all the outcome that come before its fulfilled. ¬†ūüôā

These words are right on time and target. ¬†Within the last 30 days I have been troubled by a few things that have truly made me shake my head. ¬†I refuse to let them keep me down though. ¬†The finger pointing hasn’t been resolved but I’m accepting my portion of the blame in all matters.

The issue is not as important to me as the lessons I can learn from this moment in my life. ¬†Things are going to get better with patience and true understanding of my hand in all of it and moving forward from it. ¬†Be encouraged if you’re facing a storm in your life. ¬†It’s not as bad as it seems and no matter how gloomy it looks the sun is always shining. ūüôā

Addition is a serious situation. ¬†It doesn’t always come in the form of illegal or legal drugs, gambling, sex or video games. ¬†The definition is as follows: a state characterized by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli despite adverse consequences. ¬†I have an addiction.

Mine consists of lace, elastic, soft fabrics and maybe only a handful of people see besides me. ¬†My strange addiction is Victoria’s Secret. ¬†I’ve confessed this to you before. ¬†Remember? (in my Drake voice). This can’t be hurting me – right? You’re correct to a point.


Once a month I receive a catalogue filled with all the things I love about women’s undergarments. I fold pages, mark things off and strategize how I’m going to purchase my shopping cart in a timely fashion. ¬†Every month, except during the semi-annual sale, I receive a postcard containing coupons to save on my purchases of bras. ¬†Let’s not even throw in whatever that promotional gift is albeit a bag, towel or umbrella. ¬†I like feeling good under my clothes, the way this man looks at me when I undress and having a beautiful selection of panties and bras. ¬†Let’s do a small math problem. $75 x 10 =$750 then multiply this by 3 equals $2250. ¬†This is roughly the amount of money I’ve spent in the time we’ve known each other.

There are some things going on in my life that require more of my finances. ¬†I’d like to go back to school and I DO NOT want to acquire any more debt. ¬†My car has been giving me trouble over the last couple months and the inevitable is about to occur. ¬†The financial strain of a 16-year-old young man attacking your groceries daily has produced a new expense. ¬†Let’s not even mention the responsibilities of a football parent. ¬†These are the biggest factors effecting my pocketbook. ¬†My lifestyle has changed for the better but in order to complete some items on my to do list. We need to hold on to a few more coins.

While having a conversation with “beau,” I was told I spend too much money on my Victoria’s Secret addiction. ¬†I was insulted as he sat there saying I had more than enough. ¬†So I counted and realized, I can go six full weeks without wearing a matching set more than once. ¬†Was he right? ¬†No! ¬†Then I visited my newest favorite location within the Oakland Mall in Troy, MI to purchase some new additions. ¬†Guess what happened – new bra size for little Ms. Understood. Is that a reason to stop indulging? ¬†No! ¬†What would make me reconsider my spending? ¬†This!

The Wash

This image says more than you think. ¬†I have spent $130 to store these garments properly. ¬†They literally take up an entire washing machine on wash day and that costs me $3 per load. ¬†That’s to wash and dry if I don’t hang them up to dry. ¬†My addiction is truly costing me. ¬†However, I have come up with a plan to save a little cash and still feel sexy every chance I get. ¬†Just buy them every other month as a treat for myself as I work on disciplining myself financially.

It took me a while to recover from the “Unmentionable” caper. ¬†I had to admit that I have and grew my collection. ¬†The option of using another company but I’m loyal to VS. ¬†It may not be big to you but it’s on the verge of everything to me.

Have you had to let some things go or modify your life for financial purposes? What were your reasons?

As always, number 7 resides on the 25th.  Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you all over the world.

I look like I have all the answers. ¬†Maybe that is because I’m forever open to learning how I can be better. ¬†This is in relation to anything I am involved with in my life. ¬†My recent journey into entrepreneurship was in need of direction. ¬†Sure I had formal education but even since my days in the classroom, business has changed. ¬†The only thing I acknowledged was my need for assistance and direction. ¬†After watching my Instagram feed, I became interested in the things The Powerful Women were doing to assist local women in business. ¬†I wanted to see what they had to offer.

A¬†workshop, this was going to tell us how to set up the business to move it forward successfully. ¬†I figured I could use a refresher course and gather some additional information to propel Sleeping Beauty Hair Garments, so I signed up. ¬†To my surprise I received an email informing me due to my registration for the workshop there was an opportunity for me to attend a motivational session with a world renown speaker, Dr. Laureen Wishom. ¬†I was excited and attended both events, taking notes on what I needed to do to become better in business and in my personal life. ¬†After the workshops, I had enough momentum to research the things I needed to change and create. ¬†Soon after the announcement of The Powerful women’s Luncheon arrived and I purchased my ticket. ¬†This is a great event for women to network and work to build our community of women business owners and professionals up positively.

I really appreciated these experiences.  They allowed me to set some goals for 2015 and made me take my small business seriously.  My expectations are high for the upcoming events in the new year.

With the luck of the Irish running through my veins (a very small portion). I believe it’s never been about being lucky. It has everything to do with seizing an opportunity you’ve been blessed with. Make or take the most out of everything which will assist you in your own personal growth!


Dear Detroit,

I felt it was time to write this letter to you & let you know how I truly feel. I’ve been in love with you since the 1st day I learned to spell your name. Replacing the recorded lyrics of a song to include Detroit has always brought me great joy. There’s no place like you! Weekends burning gas riding around Belle isle, bus rides downtown & the countless winter nights we shared painting the town. You raised me to never be afraid of any corner in the world I should ever feel lost on. I believed in you when it became fashionable to doubt your relevance. Traveling the world I found great humor & honor in being a true representative of your boundaries. Nothing tickled me more than people saying “Oh you from Detroit- yeah they don’t play!” It seems that I dedicated my life to being a Detroiter. The last of a dying breed! It’s been one of my goals to be here for the rest of my life. However, as we have aged and things changed, so have my desires.

We’ve had our share of downs. You not being readily available for action due to your 2 am curfew. The lack of quality shopping and entertainment in close proximity. I’m still mad about the Mercury theater. An almost acknowledging transition to the inferior place they painted you out to be. The lack of grandeur I’d seen & heard about in pictures from only decades ago. Your complete dependence on factory workers should’ve prepared me for what was next. The abandoned building that still stands that I was raped in while the 1st school I ever attended was crumbled like a melting iceberg. The alleys that I played in as a child have become open graveyards to lost souls no one cares to find. Your put on act for the 2006 Super Bowl was epic but I saw the real you & showed a few guests how we really get down. The way you’ve numbed us is almost narcotic, mystical & hypnotic. At some point, someone has to snap their fingers for us to awake.

I’m up! I thought I could hang in for the long fight but you have officially crossed the line this year. This has absolutely nothing to do with me. It holds roots in the DNA of my son. A son who has not taken to your streets maliciously. Neither has he created any defamatory ideas of the young men you produce. He’s our miracle child. Not afraid to stand up in your honor. You have failed him because twice this year your other children have threatened his life through violence. This will not be tolerated! I’ve never messed with yours let you do whatever you see fit from casinos to shutting off the lights when you want. It’s this type of respect I require as a parent to work, live & rest properly. You’ve taken too many of our sons already. Yes, mine is no more special but I feel you owe it to us to make sure that the ones that want better have a fair chance at it. Coincidentally, I see you don’t care. And it’s with this realization that I’ve come to the conclusion to throw in the towel. I refuse for you to garnish my son as you’ve done with so many others.

I refuse to be on the other side of the door for the “we’re sorry to tell you this” visit. Now that I see you don’t care about mine I can’t harbor you anymore. The time has come for us to relocate to explore the opportunity of a better life.

Do I still love you? Yes! Will I still call myself a Detroit girl? Yes! Will I still pay city taxes? No! Will we be back after you’ve had some time to think? There’s a good chance I might! As for the kid, I’m not to sure. I’ve been urging him to free himself from your grasp. This plan has been in the works for a while now. I want you to succeed & be the phoenix I know you have the strength to be. Show the world how you emerged from the man made grave they buried you in. You’re beautifully misunderstood. Moreover as a mother to her young my job is to protect him from harm. Please don’t be mad about my decision. Moving forward is moving on and it’s time.

With all my heart,

Marlea Z. Wilson


After spending the entire Summer season on the night shift, my opportunity to choose the schedule I wanted 1st came. I didn’t go for the most desired of schedules but it’s a favorable one. Moving to the day shift seemed to be a better fit for my life. The kid’s school is literally down the street and he has to be there 30 minutes before I am expected at work.

In an effort to keep things moving and not waste time and gas. We meet up in the lobby of the office and continue our day from there. On Mondays, he joins me on the Slow Roll and on the other days he readies himself for football practice. Seems pretty seamless right! I’ve discovered this can’t go on!

My days are not as profitable as I’m accustomed to on my journey. Most of the things I’d like to do are NOT getting done due to the time in transit and waiting to return home. After returning to my residence, I’m beat and I just want to go to sleep. How can I when I have a hungry kid, new puppy and small business that need me? Something suffers from the neglect. The 1st was my blog! It hurt me to see readers come everyday and I had no new content. I’ve taken my time to build this platform not to see it crumble. The next thing was Sleeping Beauty Hair Garments. Sure, I was getting the word out via Instagram but my stops at local beauty shops in the area were cut out. This created a negative effect financially on me. My ability to get out to the people and show them the product had taken me further than ever before. The new additions to the line were ready but I didn’t have the time to promote as in the past. As you can see, I wasn’t even considering ignoring #19 and Langston! It may have only been a short amount of time but it was theirs to have. It was at this moment, I knew I had to make a decision. Yes it was going to be hard on us again but it’s what had to be done. It’s the only way I’ll be happy! Isn’t that what this is all about taking risks to reach my ultimate goal? Most definitely!!

ūüôā for me because I’m still ūüôā