The Best Me

I’ve always been a thin girl. I’m not going to be fat, ever. Let’s get that straight. Whitney is not going to be fat, ever. Okay? ~ Whitney Houston

I certainly can understand what the late great was talking about! Thin- always with a pretty smile. Until my doctor told me I was underweight and things had to change. When I introduced myself to you in 2012, I was in the best shape of my life. CURVY! Being the decedent of thin relatives being the thick girl was never an option for me. After overcoming my low self-esteem because I wasn’t built like other females in my community. My face became the source of my strength and after many days of affirming myself that I was beautiful. I wore it very well and NOT from a shallow place. I felt like sharing this portion of my life with you as I looked around at the universal pressure to be fit, perfect and attractive. Most of the people I know are fighting to reduce pounds, get healthy and feel better about themselves. What could this possibly have to do with me? Well over the past couple months, I foolishly loss 12 lbs and have slid right back into the slim chick I once was! I don’t like it!

You’re probably thinking how can you lose 12 pounds by mistake! I’ll tell you how! All my life I’ve been able to just get up and go off adrenalin. I never required breakfast. So in a minor state of frustration & uncertainty I failed to eat properly. I was only eating enough to say I had ate and within a few short weeks the weight I had managed to maintain was gone. I could feel it when I moved, I saw it in the mirror and noticed it in my ill fitting clothes. Now I know some people are going to say I wish I had those problems. We’re all different. However please don’t ridicule me for my decision to be healthy.

Now because I’ve always been conscious of being in shape. I’m kind of a gym rat. I love working out but I had to realize I have to cut it out for a while to gain my proper eating habits back. No I do NOT have an eating disorder. Sometimes I allow things to overwhelm me and I just want to sleep. There was a period in November where for 2 weeks I had no appetite. This is not in my character. I love to eat, cook & eat your food if you have enough.

Here is a before and after picture of me and you can noticeably see the difference. I embraced it all! The picture on the left is from 2010 and I was 106 lbs. Right side of the frame was from my birthday when you all met me at a cool 130 lbs. I felt the best I ever have at this point after the initial shock of not being able to wear clothes I’ve had for years and paying attention to my body. I loved the skin I was in.

Over the next couple months I’m going to work on getting my happy body back! According to this app, Cal Counter, I downloaded onto my phone I have to eat a total of 3123 calories a day to reach my goal weight by mid-May. I’m currently looking for gainer diets to assist me. I’m underweight from where I felt the healthiest. I asked my family why they never told me I looked bad they ensured me they never looked at me that way. It’s not only those with a little extra meat that are concerned with their weights. Some of us are building our best bodies too. But we usually get overlooked because people tend to think we’re the lucky ones! We have health & fitness goals just as the rest of society does. Aren’t we entitled to be the best we possibly can be? I ask for your support because this is another part of my HAPPINESS journey.

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